Best Method For Brides Dealing With Wedding Day Stress
Keep These 6 Things in Mind and You'll Be Fine
By: Stefanie Rose Miles
Whether you’re planning a big wedding with tons of guests or an intimate gathering with family, don’t put off planning for wedding day stress management. Even if you feel you are not a high-stress person, having a plan is still important. Emotions run high and patience can run low, so keeping a few things in mind and implementing some key practices will help you better manage bridal stress so you can truly enjoy this most special day of your life.
You Can’t Plan for Everything.
You simply cannot have a plan for any possible thing that could happen on your wedding day, so don’t wear yourself out by trying. You and your fiancé can encourage each other by agreeing on a little mantra or a response to any of the unexpected with something like,
Come what may, we’ll be married at the end of the day.
Of course, you’re taking your vows seriously, but don’t take everything on your wedding day too terribly so. Life happens and as much as you envision this day as being perfect, at the very least a couple of things are likely not going to go exactly as planned.
Put Someone Else in Charge.
A wedding planner and/or coordinator, even if just for your wedding day, can be one of the best investments you can make in the wedding itself. Many venues and churches have an on-site coordinator, and depending on what is offered, this person may be all you need. You really should have a point person for both the ceremony and reception, and we highly recommend it not be a family member or close friend. A professional will be completely focused on taking care of the details and won't be distracted by emotion or other responsibilities a friend or family member may be. This person should be familiar with all that needs to be covered--some of which you may never have thought--and he/she should be a responsible and trustworthy enough to make some executive decisions without deferring to you for everything on your wedding day. Bear in mind this is not just someone to lead your wedding rehearsal and line everyone up to walk down the aisle. Someone (or ones) needs to be the go-to person for everything. Ensuring you have time to eat, mingle with guests, dance, and all the things you want to do during your reception, are also responsibilities of a wedding coordinator, which may not be covered by merely the venue coordinator.
Less Is More.
The fewer things you schedule for yourself on the day of your wedding, the better. If spending quality time with a parent or friend is a priority on this day, be sure to schedule it. Forgo a bridesmaids breakfast or luncheon and have some colorless, non-staining hors-d’oeuvres at the ceremony site as you and your friends leisurely get ready. You’ll certainly want to have plenty of time to have your hair and makeup done and to get to the ceremony site. If you find yourself with a growing, personal list of last-minute errands or things to do, ask for help.
Don't Neglect the Basics.
Eat and drink water. No matter how nervous you may be, do not skip a meal—even if you can only manage a few bites. Staying hydrated is also extremely important and should not be a detail overlooked the day before and the day of the wedding. And we all know how important sleep is. In anticipation of sleeplessness the night before, you may want to consider something like Tylenol PM, but if you don’t know how your body reacts to it, don’t wait until the night before to try it. For most people, two nights prior to your wedding day is probably more important for a good night’s sleep, so plan accordingly. Lastly, unless advised by your doctor, do not attempt to keep jitters at bay with muscle relaxers or some similar medication. You want to be totally lucid and remember the day!
Don't Stress About Your Guests.
Don’t be disappointed that you most likely won’t have as much time with all your guests as you'd like. Everyone will want to extend their congratulations and well wishes, and most understand and respect that all others want to do the same. A receiving line is rare these days because couples don’t want their guests waiting in line just to greet them. However, some couples still choose to incorporate one in the interest of at least attempting to thank each guest.
The best solution for making the most of your time with guests can be discussing the matter with your caterer. Depending on what food you have and how it's to be served (seated, formal dinner or a simple dessert reception) your caterer can advise you how best to minimize wait time and maximize time for visiting and celebrating. A seated meal, by its very nature, is more restrictive than a buffet or food station alternative. In the case of the latter, it works best if the couple can be served first and then seated in a such a way that guests can stop by to greet. You may find it challenging to eat in any of these settings, but you won’t want to miss out on the delectables you’ve taken such care in choosing.
The Devil is Always in the Details.
Don’t forget about all the “afters.” Make a plan with your caterer for any leftovers, particularly cake, and have someone in charge of taking it all to its final destination. Details such as packing the top of the cake, the cake knife, champagne flutes, etc. can sometimes be forgotten until the last minute. Ask ahead of time for someone to also take any gifts where they need to be taken. Are there decorations, extra programs, a guest book, flowers, personal items, etc. that need to be transported from the ceremony site and/or the reception venue? Even the best wedding planners don’t know all your needs in these regards unless you communicate them. They should, however, either deliver or help you with your plan for all final vendor payments and tips. Make sure anyone in the wedding party renting tuxedos knows the plan for returning them.
Every bride’s wedding day is accompanied by some level of stress, which is only natural. But with some forethought and pre-planning of all the small stuff will help you better manage your stress and that of others. Pace yourself so that when the big day finally arrives you have time to take care of yourself and enjoy being a bride, as you should. When it’s all said and done you will be married and your new life will just be getting started!